Marriage & Couples - Lesson One
Recipe For a Sweet Marriage
You may need your Bible and a pen & notebook to complete these lessons. You should be able to copy and paste these outlines to your word processor and print them without difficulty if you so desire. We recommend you record in your note book deep thoughts or questions that may arise as you study, and certainly record all things God reveals to your heart. Look over these notes frequently and use them even as you pray. God will cause you to grow in wisdom and understanding. Keep your note book with you throughout the day as much
as possible to record all God reveals to you and to review the things you have learned.
We also recommend you make a habit of memorizing a scripture each week. This not only helps get the Word deep in your heart, but is also an excellent mental exercise.
8 Ingredients For Marital Bliss
1) Patience
You are going to need this. If you don’t have any, you’ll have to get some.
Perhaps taking up fly fishing, stamp collecting or quilting will helpJ.
2) Forgiveness
Both of you! No matter how difficult! Trust is earned. It is not easily
regained once blown, so if you’ve blown it, see point one. It may take
YEARS to regain.
3) Diligence
You have to take care of your spouse. Whether your job is the main bread
winner or you are the stay at home parent, or any combination, you have
to be diligent with your responsibilities. Work with each other. You wife
is not your mother, nor is your husband a slave.
4) Selflessness
When is it time to put your spouse’s desires ahead of your own? Within
reason, Always. That’s not to say you have to join in on every
cockamamie thing your spouse dreams up, but be willing to put them
first as much as possible.
5) Humor
Laughing at yourself is NOT optional, it is REQUIRED! Don’t take
yourself so serious all the time. No one is perfect. So laugh at your
Mistakes, but learn from them. Both of you will grow stronger and wiser
together.
6) Consideration
You have to consider how your spouse feels about ALL decisions. Don’t
Think you can get away with making all the big decisions all the time, or
your relationship is headed for some bumpy road!
7) Flexibility
Don’t be unwilling to bend to the wishes of your partner. Every strong
relationship consists of a lot of give and take in order to be healthy.
8) Holy Spirit
This is your best friend at all times. Only He can know you even better
than your spouse, or yourself for that matter. His power and grace will
cause you to succeed where otherwise you may have failed. Lean on Him
frequently. Without Him you can do nothing.
Directions for Marital Bliss
1) Preheat
Men and women definitely differ in what they respond to. It is these stimuli that
will need to be understood in order to cook up a perfect marriage. Once you see how
your spouse responds to different approaches by you, you have the all the tools you
need. Use these types of stimuli to keep your spouse happy. Guy’s, this means “sex
starts in the kitchen”
- If you start with helping do a task you normally don’t do ( like peel potatoes)
without her asking first, you are already “warming her up”
- Others respond differently. Perhaps a text during the day that says I absolutely love
you, and can’t keep you off my mind, or maybe pick her up a single rose on the way
home from work and surprise her.
* In order to preheat correctly, know what stimulates your spouse.
2) Mix Things well
Monotony can be a real joy robber. Don’t allow yourselves to develop such routine that
their isn’t room for spontaneity. Do different things often. Freak her/him out one day
by phoning in sick and taking off to Calgary with your spouse to go for lunch at his/her
favorite restaurant. (this is just an example - don’t surprise your spouse this way if this
could bring a negative reaction) The point is, change things up once in a while. Winter
time is far to easy a time to get into the work, eat, T.V., sleep routine. It being dark
outside at 5pm doesn’t help, but don’t allow this type of routine to go on endlessly.
Weeks can turn into months, months in to years.
3) Grease the pan
In all but extremely rare cases, your in-laws are important to your spouse.
Depending on the relationship you have with them, this may be comfortable, or
uncomfortable, but either way, you should include your in-laws in you inner circle.
Family is very important. If the family tree is not in healthy shape, being unsaved or in
extreme cases, hostile toward you, than let your spouse know you still care about
them. Pray for them often, on your own, at mealtime and together. These are the people
that raised the one you love. They do matter.
4) Bake ‘till it’s done
The art of growing old together is filled with ups and downs. Don’t think because
there is some turmoil that somehow your marriage isn’t perfect. There is no such
thing as a perfect marriage. Fairy tales don’t exist. But days of heaven on earth are
possible in your marriage. Keep care of each other. Lean on each other. Hug each
other often and always be the first to say “I’m sorry”. The more small victories you
have together in your relationship, the more your depth of love will grow. Making it
last isn’t what’s hard. Just do the little things that make each other feel loved, and the
years will swim by, way to fast, but each day you’ll be happier and more fulfilled than
you were the day before.
School Of Faith with Dan & Suzann Marriage &Couples - 1